Does not knowing all your limits lead to adverse reactions?

In all probability, you will not be aware of all your limits, sometimes they’ll creep up on you during a scene and you’ll have to call an end to it. Or you will find yourself having a strong emotional aversion to something not realizing the underlying psychological connection to it.

It’s how you deal with this emotional upheaval after that’s important.

Find a friend who’s on your level or a Mentor to discuss things with.  By friend, I mean someone in the Life who is also a Dom (if you’re a Dom) or sub (if you’re sub). Yes, it’s an important distinction.

A slave won’t understand the nuances of being a Dom because they don’t “think that way”.

For instance, a Dominant may struggle emotionally after an intense whipping scene, yet the submissive is smiling and full of joy. Though the submissive would seek to alleviate the Dominants sense of guilt, and reassure the Dominant they are ok. Another Dominant would be better able to assist them to understand the internal struggle they have of “hurting” someone they care for and find arousal in their cries.

Not all Dominants struggle with their actions and at times it’s something obscure that will cause the trigger. Everyone is different.  Thus, each Dominant must sets their own limits and boundaries to ensure the health and safety of themselves and their sub/slaves.

It’s paramount to remember that BDSM isn’t just about the physical but more so the emotional and psychological connections made.


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